Why I write!

Some people (including myself) probably wonder why in the world do I write this blog? I am sure that you spend your busy day wondering this, so I will give you an answer broken into two parts:

1. To make Christ known!
I believe that technology is a double edge sword. It can do magnificent things and has done awesome things for the Kingdom, and the spread of the gospel in digital format, as well as given people like me easy access to research on biblical texts, lexicons for language, etc... It also can be used for evil: pornography, stalking, gossip and slander.
I have chosen this vehicle to make Christ (who he is, what he has done, how he did it) known to those who read as an encouragment to them, and a light for those who stumble across it looking for something. THis is done mainly through topics God lays on my heart or an article I read that provoked Christ to be known in it.

2. To give clear biblical explanations
We all see the world through a lens. Some lens are fallible, broken and some are motivated by something bigger than themselves. As Christians I firmly believe that we must see the world's issues through Christ' eyes. If Scripture is the clearest vision of Christ, then we must start there. I read articles daily on the brokenness of relationships, experience and read about divorce both in the church and out, teen sex, broken homes, abuse, the poor, and total devastation of poor areas. Scripture gives us aid, and (should) motivate us to action, but most importantly it instructs on how to react, and handle these situations. God said he would teach, instruct, and counsel us..
Psalm 32:8-"
I will teach you and instruct you in the way you should go,
I will counsel you and watch over you."

Plus, there are crazy groups (that claim to be CHristian) who distort Scripture to fit their own opinions, and agendas. If we do not have a biblical viewpoint on topics and issues, then aren't we simply giving our opinion? (which clearly is not relevant in comparison to God's inspired Word)

3. My struggles
Sometimes I use this to illustrate where God is working on me. Sometimes God just says share this so that people can see Christ manifested in reality. Plus I never want to be one of those pastors who simply write all theology and no application in their own life. Seems too pious, and too unrealistic. I always pray that my struggles and successes can illustrate Christ and encourage others.

4. I can expose people to other pastors, leaders and information about Christ!
I love to put links to articles, videos, to help illustrate points 2 and 3. For example, recently there I found a great website that I am now subscribed to that has many resources for Christians, pastors and lay leaders. On it they have a list of things that the late Pastor Martyn Lloyd Jones learned as a pastor, teacher and Christian. Its a wonderful list and I think we can all relate in some way to what he learned and yet still needed to learn.

Here is the link [click here]

I hope and pray that this blog has been helpful for you. If not, maybe something to read or consider from a biblical standpoint.

Be Blessed!

Disconnecting with an Illusion of Connecting

I remember as a kid, I wanted to be an NBA star. I would spend countless hours playing basketball with friends so that I could be like Larry Bird (I know that I am giving my age here), and pretty much anyone on the Boston Celtics 1980's squad. When I got into high school, I spent lots of time socializing with my friends playing sports and hanging on the weekends. We would pull pranks, talk, and just hang out all the time. I built connections and friendships based on face to face interaction, and memories that required work, effort and time.

That era is coming to a close. We are now in the new technological era of facebook, twitter, and cellphones in the hands of 8 year olds. You can reconnect with old high school buddies, tweet something you just saw, or call and text to your hearts content. Whether we like it or not it has changed the landscape of relationships and obtaining of new ones: I would argue both positive and negative.

I will be the first as a pastor tell you that I text a lot, I use my phone all the time and it is extremely helpful. I can text youth, young adults and even adults (like my mom) to keep in touch, schedule hang out times, and just catch up (currently I am messaging my sister on facebook). It allows me to be up to date with information and yet at the same time it feels and seems like a lonely world.

The problem I have with it is that it seems to make us lonely and it can create tension within relationships. Even in my life I see where I have my phone in hand staring at it when I have someone sitting right next to me. Or I hear the little jingle of a text message and I really really want to answer it or see who it was.

ANother major problem is that people seem to want to deal with situations that they would normally be face to face and deal with it via twitter, or facebook, or text. Like breaking up with someone, or telling someone off, or even a serious conversation about life. Why? The argument is usually because its easier, but I think the problem is deeper than that. I think that it is a lack of emotional confidence to deal with a situation face to face.

Recently their was an article about this very subject and here is what MIT director and sociologist Sherry Turkle said about relationships and technology:

People would rather text than talk, because they can control how much time it takes. They can control where it fits in their schedule. When you have the amount of velocity and volume [of communication] that we have in our lives, we have to control our communications very dramatically. So controlling relationships becomes a major theme in digital communication. And that's what sometimes makes us feel alone together — because controlled relationships are not necessarily relationships in which you feel kinship.

So there is loneliness as we try to control all the relationships, therefore creating less of a connection or "kinship" with other people.

But what was most interesting to me (I know this is a biblical blog and wondering where the bible was going to come in) was what she said in context of youth but is absolutely applicable to you and I:

"On the one hand, they're so together that all they can do is text. And I identify with these teenagers, because it's the way we're all living our lives: you wake up in the morning, and you have 500 e-mails or 100 messages, and you say, "I don't have time to do anything but respond to this." So your life becomes completely reactive — you don't feel alone, but you don't feel connected.

What you certainly don't have time to do is experience solitude. One of the most important things that we're really losing is the ability to just be alone in a restorative way.

Scripture constantly tells us to take a time to worship God through stillness. Psalm 46:10, tells us to Be still and know that I am God." The meaning behind "Be still", is the notion of being weak and not an inability sort of way but a recognition that God is powerful, and in control of all things. We achieve this better when we spend a time with no distractions, no emails, text messages, tweets, calls, whatever it may be. Spending time in solitude with God is refreshing, restorative, and flat out awesome.

Lately to counter act my digital culture, I have been spending time getting up early to watch the sun rise and praying. Its relaxing and extremely productive in my busy schedule. Its followed by a time in the Psalms, reading, reflecting and praying on the things that God continues to work on me, and praising Him for simply being my God.

The Psalms alone mention meditation or musing over God's work or his law over 16 times!

Here is just two:

Psalm 1:2: "

Blessed is the one....

but whose delight is in the law of the LORD,

and who meditates on his law day and night.

Psalm 77:12: "

I will consider all your works

and meditate on all your mighty deeds.”

Psalm 119 has meditation on God's law, work, decrees, precepts, 8 times!

What are you currently doing to experience solitude? Are you able to have a time of stillness, to be restored or filled up in His glory and peace? Feel free to share in the comments section.

Be Blessed.

New Years Resolutions

By now the presents are all open, the wrapping paper a heaping pile of trash. The tree may still be up but it doesn't have the same luster as before. Holiday sales are gone, the rush, the crowds have died down. The anxiety of trying to pick the right kind of gift no longer a problem. Then our second piggy back holiday New Years comes and passes. The confetti, the food, the drinks, the reflection on 2010 all become a distant past as we embark on the new 2011. Right now gyms across America are being bombarded by the swarms of people who are forever trying to sweat out holiday food and fat so they can get into shape for 2011. This is the time of year that people make resolutions for themselves or goals. The problem with New Year resolutions is that we don't really seem to keep them. A resolution is the the act of resolving or determining upon an action or course of action. So some people are determining that their course of action will be that they will work out, lose weight and be fit this year. Or they will stop smoking, or cursing, being unorganized or annoying. While I don't doubt that some people can achieve something they put their mind to ( I know this sounds like a kids motivational book--gross), these all seem characteristic of a deeper problem. A heart issue if you will.

Instead of focusing on your outside I hope and pray that you take a hard look at the inside: the condition and state of your heart. This can be done through evaluation of one's relationship with Christ through prayer and Scripture. (FYI this is not a works righteousness litmus test---your ability to want to be closer, and pursue avenues that will bring you closer is simply enabled by God's work and grace. See Philippians 2:12-13). Here is one that I pray for daily and not because it is the New Year.

1. I want to be more consistent in my time in the Word, and in prayer.
Psalm 119:10-11: "How can a young man keep his way pure? By living according to your word.
I seek you with all my heart.....do not let me stray from your commands.
I have hidden your word in my heart so that I may not sin against you.
Psalm 119:14: I rejoice in following your statutes...

Here in one of the greatest Psalms we see a joy, a seeking, and longing for God's Word, decree, law, or statutes. It has been said by John Piper that, "God's Word most clearly reveals WHO God is." God displays his power and glory through nature (Psalm 19:1-5, Romans 1:19-20--i.e. General Revelation), but He is most clearly revealed in the Person and Work of Jesus Christ in which is revealed in Scripture (i.e. Special Revelation). Who says you can't learn a little theology?
The problem is we know (esp. as believers) who Jesus is, we have heard all the stories, the problem is we aren't consistent in areas such as worship, prayer, and word time. We tend to get too busy to fit in a time where we are not distracted by cell phones, TV, football, friends, family, that we tend to do the same with God (I will fit Him into to my schedule). If you ever read your Bible, you realize God doesn't just fit in to Your little schedule book??!!!
Yes you should have a time with God, but that requires 3 things:

1. Sacrifice: of your time-(getting up early, staying up late, changing your day around to do this) , of your energy (prayer, and pursuit of consistency requires an active mind, heart) , and of

2. Be organized: Meaning when you do spend time go in with a plan: what time, what place, what method (meaning memorizing Scripture, reading a particular book, etc... (John Pipers When I Don't Desire God book goes into great detail)

3. Shut up and Listen: We are always constantly trying to talk at God. It makes sense, we do with everyone else in our lives. We are talking about our jobs, our relationships, how hard life is, mix it with some complaining about how tired we are and our prayers and word time become complaint sessions. Now biblically, Jeremiah was a major whiner and complained several times, (hence he is called the Lament Prophet--basically a whiny baby), David also whines a lot in the Psalms, but these complaints were of a righteous nature. They cried out to God about the injustice and when He would kick everyone's butt, or take care of a situation. We don't get a well I work a lot God, and my schedule is booked, or I hate my job, or I wish I had more friends.

Instead, stop for just a second. In our busy world to be still is almost a miracle. We are in fast paced world, and being still is becoming extinct. You can give God your requests but stop talking at him, talk to Him. Tell Him what is on your heart. Being still can reveal quite a bit of what is going on in our lives, including the course we are currently on.

Psalm 46:10 says, "Be still and know that I am God."

John Piper, reflecting on the importance of being still and in relation to his life, describes what the stillness before God while on a flight to Massachusetts did:

"What came clear in the stillness was at least this much: I want to leave behind four God-centered sons; I want to leave behind a loved and honored and cherished wife; I want to leave behind a strong, biblically grounded, Christ-exalting, radically obedient, God-enjoying church; and I want to leave behind a written testimony to the truth of God, and the supremacy of God, and the beauty of God, and the worth of God in all of life. And to that end I want to keep my life free from the love of money, and the praise of men, and the power of position, and any impurity that would dull my delight in God.

If you let yourself be still this morning and know that God is God, that he will be exalted among the nations, that his kingdom is an everlasting kingdom, that your life here is very short, then you will see what your life is supposed to be. God will make your unique significance plain.

Be Blessed

Tis the Season to be Jolly

In my last blog I talked about the aspects of Thanksgiving, and how we rush to get past it to get to X-mas. Well Christmas time is here, and this season tends to have the same kind of characteristics each year:

1. Traffic

2. Masses of people shopping for the perfect Christmas gift

3. Kindness in select moments (due to the seasons magic)

4. Rudeness during the same season (from people we assume to be Grinches)

Lights, trees, presents, tinsel, stockings, lots of sugar cookies, candy, chocolate are the fuel for the Christmas season. All of these things I love and can't wait to participate in, but as a believer I tend to step back and wonder if we have missed the point. Or rather we have combined the reason for the season (please excuse this horrible phrase--reminds me of the seatbelt slogan in my area: Arrive alive!) with the secular madness of Christmas. There are some interesting facts about Christmas that I knew but the more I thought about it made me appreciate more of what Christmas truly represents.

1. Jesus' birthday wasn't necessarily on Dec. 25th

Sorry if I have ruined Christmas for you (by the way Santa isn't real either), but Jesus probably wasn't born in Dec. Schlars have debated this but newer scholarship has shown that he more than likely was born in the end of March or the first week in April. This comes from the fact that th shepherds would not have been abiding in the field with their sheep out during the coldest part of the year. They mainly kept the sheep in from winter to the beginning of Spring. Also Mary traveled great distances (Matthew) in the coldest part of the year. Now by far this isn't impossible, but unlikely. Plus December 25th was originally a pagan holiday. It was a festival celebrating the longer length of daylight which was shorten from the Winter Solastice (which was one of the shortest daylight days of the year). The Catholic Church through some of the early church father's like Hippolytus and Chrystostm, both around the time of the 4th Century, decided to begin celebrating Jesus' birth on this day as they believed it to be. Again it doesn't say that it is impossible, but He more than likely wasnt.

2. The early church did not celebrate Christ birth

No where in Acts do we see a celebration with lights, trees or even a food festival (they were pretty good at throwing big food parties)! The early church did not celebrate Jesus' birth. We have no written record, no festival laid out. Why? Well the early church wasn't concerned with his birth but rather His death and ressurrection. If the birth would have meant something important to the early church they would have recorded it. Even Jesus didn't mention it. Yet within the first 4 chapters of Acts (Acts 2:24, 32; 3:15; 4:10) four times Jesus' death and ressurrection was mentioned to the masses of people. Not that His birth wasn't important but His death and resurrrection was the central focus of the early church, Paul, and the church today.

3. The Christmas story comes mainly from Matthew, Luke.

The Christmas story is a combination of Matthew story (which follows the model of Jesus being the "new Moses"--baby being taken to Egypt, then fleeing Egypt..etc) and Luke's story to Theolphilus.

Often the Christmas story seems like 1 fluid story, but in reality it is the combination of Matthew and Luke stories together. Example: Luke has no record of Magi, Matthew does. Mark, nor John have any birth narratives in their books. Now they were writing to different communities, and Mark and John not having them doesn't negate Jesus' birth, but just making sure that we understand where the stories come from.

Okay so now in some eyes they would say that I have ruined Christmas. This is not my intention. I never said that we as Christians should NOT celebrate Christmas. What I wanted to do was make sure you understood that we just take all of this holiday information and believe that it must be true. Why should we celebrate how great God is on ONE day?? (not Sunday either) Christmas represents a view of the church, not necessarily a biblical view. For me Christmas seems to symbolize something that we should be doing year round. I think that is why it is so hard to see people being nice, or having an extra pep in their step, or churches flooded once a year. Christmas' meaning is celebrating Christ, as Lord and Savior.....this done by his people living, acting like him YEAR ROUND. Its that kind reminder that "Hey your living for me. You want to celebrate me, then live like it everyday of your life".

I just dont want people to get a distorted unbiblical picture of Christmas, you need to know why these things are in place in our soceity. They are not as religious as some politicans and religious activists want.

Scripture is clear, we celebrate and glorify God daily (or we should) as his people. Christmas symbolizes family, both Christian and physical. Celebrating His greatness and holiness with family members, and sharing the message of the gospel to all we come encountered with. That's the reason to be jolly, not cause of snowmen, and overweight, 60 year old men in red track suits, but because of the glorious death and resurrection of Jesus Christ.

I hope that you have a Merry Christmas, and a wonderful New Year.

Be Blessed

Being thankful

Well more than likely most pastors around the U.S. have probably preached a sermon about being thankful. I don't think there is anything wrong with preaching about thankfulness. I guess the issue I have is that why do we have to wait till thanksgiving to actually be provoked to think about things we are thankful for? We have all heard someone say that they love these holidays for the atmosphere or the air of joy, thankfulness, and gifts. But once again my question seems to beg a response from us as individuals the other 363 days of the year. Obviously I am not making a blanket statement about every person in the world, but in America, especially for the Christian shouldn't an outward/inward thankfulness be evident year round?




1. Thanksgiving should be continuous despite your circumstances:

1 Thessalonians 5:16-18:
"Rejoice always, pray continually, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus"
This passage is one of the landmark Christian passages dealing with thanksgiving. Not only does it imply through language (the Greek indicates a this phrase to be a present active imperative--meaning it is a continuous, command) but also the occasion to give thanks (in all circumstances). This is a lesson that I myself am learning on a daily basis. Our society has ingrained in us a notion that when we are happy things go well, when we are sad then its all terrible. With that comes the idea of giving less thanks when things are difficult or bad, and to give more attention to thankfulness when success, and ease of life comes. I will put this in bold, nowhere does Scripture indicate this thought process. In fact, Scripture tells us that suffering, pain are for our benefit! (read Philippians, Romans 5:3-4, 2 Tim. 3:12) That pain and suffering are part of the Christian walk! (2 Tim. 3:12) and that we will see it in our lives. Once again using this verse, Paul does not indicate that circumstances should dictate our thankfulness or our prayer life, or our joy! (Read back a couple blogs on my entry on joy for a deeper analysis.) Give thanks----always.

2. Thanksgiving is a part of Kingdom living: (Eph. 5:1-4)
What most of us forget (in application not always intellectually), is that thanksgiving is an integral part of our Christian walk! Not only have we been transformed by the blood of Christ, given new life, adopted into a new family, given a Father of perfect love, who never abandons us but its part of our sanctification, part of our newly transformed character!

Ephesians 5:-4
Follow God’s example, therefore, as dearly loved children and walk in the way of love, just as Christ loved us and gave himself up for us as a fragrant offering and sacrifice to God. But among you there must not be even a hint of sexual immorality, or of any kind of impurity, or of greed, because these are improper for God’s holy people. Nor should there be obscenity, foolish talk or coarse joking, which are out of place, but rather thanksgiving.

Once again Paul is writing to the Ephesians about the kind of new life (4:23) they should be living. They were to put off the old self (4:22), put off falsehood (4:25), anger (4:26), and not to let the devil have a foothold in their lives (4:27).
Remember the old Michael Jordan commercials by Gatorade in the early 90's? If not here is one VIDEO (I know I'm dating myself) but the video basically has Jordan doing moves and people desperately trying to imitate him. Paul is using similar language in this passage. He encourages them to "be like Christ", imitate him, look like him, since you are new children of Christ. The old self does all this stuff....you shouldnt, your new, instead you should give thanks! Paul makes it a point for the Ephesian to understand that thanksigiving is part of the new Kingdom life! It will be in the Kingdom, it was part of Christ, and it should be part of our daily life since we are new creations!!!

Unlike our society that tries to hurry up the wonderful aspect of Thanksgiving, to get to Christmas, take some time now to be thankful for some things. Instead of thinking of Black Friday, Cyber Monday, Super sales, buy, buy, buy---why not make a list of things your thankful for. But my point is this, being thankful, thanksgiving is NOT a holiday for the Christian! Its a lifestyle or at-least should be.

Be Blessed

Lights, Camera,........ Jesus?

Okay this the time of the year where many churches will celebrate the birth of our Lord Jesus Christ. Now please believe me when I say that I do not condemn plays, nor do I hate plays, or think that it is un-Christian and the bearing of people's salvation rests in this, but I do question where we have gone with celebrating by putting on X-Mas plays specifically on Sunday mornings. (Note I know all churches don't do this)
Couldn't we celebrate the birth of Christ through our lifestyle, or by hearing preaching of His own Word? I know many churches put on plays, mine is included. But I sat thinking to myself the other day about why we do them. The answers were less than convincing: we feel a need to do them because of culture , not from a biblical perspective. We have them because we have always had them, or because that's what Christians do during Christmas and Easter. Now I know some people auotmatically would say, Hey wait, the play illustrates the gospel and it is a remembrance of the birth of God and it provides people an outlet to use their gifts and talents! All those things are true, but are they true because Scripture says so or because we think so? What I am getting at is this: I think that the holidays become more about the play than the message. That people want to be entertained, rather than hear the Word proclaimed, that these plays become more about the production with a thanks to Jesus afterwards. I was part of 3 different Easter plays. All in our huge orchestra. We are talking big budget Michael Bay type plays here. We had 150 actors and actresses, dancers, live animals, a 20 man tech grew, closed circuit TV, dvd sales, the same Jesus for 6 years straight (I tell you its hard to find a dude who looks like Jesus when you have had the same guy do it that long) and David Hassolhoff as Judas. Okay maybe not the last part but you get the hint. The question I would ask is do we really need plays? Do we need the production to truly appreciate X-mas or the impact of Easter? Or better phrased have we gotten out of hand with the holiday rituals and taken less focus off the mission?

I will use Acts as a basis for the simplicity the church can have during the X-mas, Easter season.


1. Think about the early church
The early church is a great example, not because they were great people, but because they had so much simplicity. Read the book of Acts, it has so much contained in it that teaches us about the power of the Holy Spirit and an available and willing heart.
Acts 2-Holy Spirit comes at Pentacost

Acts 2:14-41-Peter preaches the gospel

Acts 2:42-47-Early church has fellowship: apostles teaching, breaking bread, prayer

Acts 3:12-4:1-22: Peter preaches to the people (after a healing) and preaches to the Sanhedrin the gospel.

Acts 4:32-36-Believers share all things, take care of each other

The list is endless, I didn't even get into the numerous Paul sermons on the gospel.

Just look at what the early church leaders had:
1. They used the power of the Holy Spirit: Peter before he preached 2:4; before the Sanhedrin-4:8; believers were filled with the Holy Spirit which helped them preach the Word of God boldly-4:31,and so on.

2. Preached the gospel: Peter, and Paul dominate the speeches in Acts (Stephens is the longest) and each time they simply preached the gospel: the death and resurrection of Christ. That was the early churches soteriology (soteria-Greek for salvation/ logos=study--study of salvation). That was the powerful message, they proclaimed it where ever they went--that was their focus. (Acts 2:23-24,32; 3:15-16; 4:10; and read any Paul book)

3. They lived it out: Notice in the passages above I show that there are many instances of reactions to the preaching, and Spirit. People lived out the glory of God: Acts 2:42-46; 4:32-37.


Imagine if we [the church]...lived like that today. So much of ministry and evangelism is tends to get caught up in techniques, and what other books say, or how, when, why, where??!!! We need committees, meetings, and approval by the Supreme Court sometimes to do things. These guys just were empowered by the Spirit, preached the gospel, and lived it out.

Also just imagine if we told Paul, Peter or any of the 12 to put on a X-mas play during worship. How silly would that sound to them? Paul may punch you, Peter might yell, Philip was supposedly small so he wouldn't do much. It would be silly. They would say: Keep Focus on the mission (Christ) through preaching and serving.

I just feel like we have gone a little overboard, thats all. You can disagree, that's what is great about a blog and the internet. You can stare and this and be like "Hmm well this dude is a satanist and hates people with talent." Maybe I am, but my goal is get you to think biblically, not culturally. Plays are a part of culture, and entertainment. Those are the qualities we look for and it is no different with X-mas or Easter. Are they fun, yes. Are they exciting, sure. Do they stir our emotions, sometimes, but we need to hear the Word preached, proclaimed from His Word. We can take time, money, and effort to create an elaborate production to make a picture of the gospel. Why not use the money for those less fortunate, use the time for missions, and use the effort in preaching the gospel, empowered by the HOly Spirit, and then living it out everyday like it was X-mas or Easter.......its just a thought.

Be Blessed.

We are Cowards!

Just admit it. We are cowards! Your probably asking what in the world is he talking about. Or how DARE you call me a coward! So I am not trying to insult you (well maybe a little) rather just trying to get you to see that in a way we are all cowards. Have you ever had a problem with someone, or something someone did? Whether it was to you or to someone else? Ever get irritated with someone, annoyed or angered? Well I definitely have and some of them have come from within the church. Yes I said it, INSIDE the church (I do not speak of the building I work in but the overall body of Christ). There are stories perusing my mind now of situations I could have handled much better if I had just approached that person in love. Instead the natural human tendency is to tell someone else. Saying how they hurt you or mistreated you or just flat out stink as a human being. Though all those things can be true of that person, is this the most biblical way to treat someone? Well frankly no! Let's see what the bible says,

1. No matter what the problem is, or what they did to you, you MUST forgive them.

This is the one people tend to cringe on during sermons and talks. Everyone loves to be forgiven and sometimes its a lot easier but to forgive someone that has wronged you takes some serious gut check.
Matthew 6:12-" Forgive us our debts, as we also have forgiven our debtors..."

Ouch the assumption here is a present tense, "forgive us God", as in the past tense "we have also forigven those who hurt us, wrong us, made us angry." Watch a documentary called As We Forgive. It will make your petty arguments and silly differences seem so small. If people can forgive those in Christ for murdering their families, and yet you hold a grudge cause of an argument??

How can we ask for forgiveness from a loving God, yet not illustrate that same characteristic back to His people? Here's where it really hurts:
Matthew 6:14-15:
"For if you forgive other people when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive others their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins.

Double ouch! I think this verse is self-explanatory! (Also read Matthew 18:21-35)

2. We are called to love them regardless of what the situation is.
Jesus was asked what the greatest commandment was. Obviously it was to trick him, and get him to basically sound like a Pharisee. Instead He said, Love the Lord your God with all your heart, soul, mind and strength. Then he said to , Love your neighbor." He didn't say (and sometimes I wish he did), Love your neighbor, but only when they love you back. Not when they act stupid, or say something behind your back. You can get angry with them, and say anything about them as long as its justified by your own bias and skewed logic!
Yeah sounds funny but this is how we think....we are called to love despite the falleness of people. (this goes for unbelievers to!!)

3. We must be willing to approach, be truthful and if possible let them go.
(Matthew 18:15-20)
The one thing that I think is most irritating for both parties is the unwillingness to approach each other. We either wait till the other person approaches us, or we wait FOREVER to approach the other person. Well you say I am not ready. I believe that, I have been there but the issue must be talked about (though its not was at all). Not only is approaching them hard, but telling the truth in love is even harder. To tell someone that they hurt you, or "show them their fault" is really hard to do. It makes you vulnerable in the sense of saying, "You hurt me, and you have the capacity to hurt me this way." But Matthew 18:15, tells us that we should "go and show" the faults or hurt we experienced. Then Jesus gives us steps by which aid our ability to deal with someone who hurt us:
1. Go and show, if they listen great, if not go to step two.

2. Bring one or two people with you, if they refuse to hear it go to step 3 (this way people can help to mediate, and counsel those who are hurting, but also to testify that something or someone has been wronged)

3. Bring it before the church and gossip about it till the moon turns red and treat them like crap! Okay maybe not but Jesus is making clear, that if someone is wronged that they should approach that person, love them, bring others into it for counsel and mediation (NOT gossip) then if they refuse let them go.


See the world has infected the church with the notion that if I am wronged, gossip about it. Tell everyone BUT the person who you have issue with. If we are upset with someone, 99.9999% of the time, it is due to mis-communication, or NO communication. And those two things only complicate a situation where there has been a wrong committed. Gossip, or malice or running to other people to bash, or burn their character just illustrates how much of a coward you really are. This is NOT a biblical based attitude toward other people, rather a worldly attitude that makes us feel good.
I have had many times where I have wanted to be ugly, to tell someone off, and to lay into someone about all their faults and short-comings. But I always have to catch myself and say is this the most Christ-like thing I can do? How would God gain any glory from me gossiping and tearing down someone else? I must retreat to His word, and not only retreat, I must submit to what it says (and not make loopholes or justify myself). Thankfully I am "under-construction" and being sanctified daily.

Be Blessed